Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Where Was T. Boone Pickens in 1978?


His face has been on TV spots for some days now and today he was on Capitol Hill. The oilman turned a shade of brownish-green. The New York Times notes that he helped underwrite and made no apologies for the Swift Boat campaign against John Kerry. He's not a saint. Rather, he's drilled the hell out of the earth, sucking millions of barrels of crude and countless billions of dollars with it.


Now, apparently, he's had an epiphany. Here in 2008 at the age of 80 Pickens must be thinking about the after-life and just what he is going to say to St. Peter at them pearly gates. Today he said to Congress that it is 'absolute madness — financially and in terms of national security — to be spending $700 billion every year on imported oil produced in volatile and in some cases hostile countries.' CAt last comes the light, albeit on a slow train. Very slow.


Jimmy Carter turned down the thermostats at the White House and put on a sweater in 1978 as an example of the dangers of depending on imported foreign oil. Right-wingers and conservatives chided him about that and drove him from the White House, sweater and all.


They always seem to be slow on the draw- the conservatives and their loony right flank. In fact, many still deny global warming and evolution, yet think the Bible is the inerrant word of God. It is always a hoot when peeking in on that gaggle.


So, with the help of his name and his billions, Mr. Pickens declares what many of us already knew decades ago: carbon addiction is killing us. But wait! Not ALL carbon and not methane/propane because the use of natural gas is one of the pillars of his new proposal. Many have noted that Iran sits atop the largest bubble of that gas and so one cannot overlook a possible preemptive war with this Axis of Evil member to recover 'our' gas.


All in all, it is a fascinatingly convoluted story that might make a good theme for a sit-com this fall. John McCain will be cast as the younger Pickens crying, "DRILL! DRILL!" in every scene. I'll let your imagination figure out the rest of the cast. It should serve as a diversion for the couch potatoes who want to be entertained during the election season. Pass the Doritos.


Funny stuff. Always a hoot on the right side.

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